While our little yellow house looks rather cute from the outside, with its cheery walls and two tone red roof (the painters ran out of one colour and just started again with another), inside… well, the running joke between the husband and I is to ask “what will fall apart this week???”

This is the house that could(n’t).

Couldn’t have everything in working condition. Could not go a week without something falling apart.

While I’m rather fond of the little yellow house that could(n’t), it will be a relief to move back to Sydney where house repairs happen on a semi regular basis.

The little house that could(n’t) contains:

• One slightly leaking roof, particularly in the master bedroom
• No water pressure.
• A temperamental water heater that must be turned on at least 20 minutes before you need said hot water, so that it can heat and then rest. As pipes cannot be expected to turn on immediately, can they?
• A shower that uses town water which makes me super itchy, because there is so much salt and lime in the water supply.
• Electricity that can’t handle more than one appliance turned on at the same time, if you want your lights to work.
• Approximately 15 geckos.
• A broken light switch in the laundry.
• A washing machine that leaks water all over the laundry floor and periodically gives you a nice little electric shock.
• A fridge that has two settings – freezing cold and super cold, so that everything is kept slightly icy. Both fridge and freezer need defrosting every few weeks.
• A stove top that has two settings – Hot and HOT HOT. So that most things end up slightly burnt is not monitored extremely closely.

It keeps life interesting. And a roof over our heads.

The road we live on. 

(otherwise known as the things in life that are worrying me a lot and I am trying to remember the verses “in everything, with prayer and petition, present your requests to the Lord” but not doing so great on that one.)

Dear God,

Please let my dog get successful exported to Australia.

And if you could find us an affordable, pet friendly house to rent in Sydney that would be good too. 

Please let my husband get the job he applied for.

And let me get a job too.

Give our politicians enough wisdom to see that cutting our Foreign Aid budget is a terrible idea.

While you’re at it, feel free to bring back K-Rudd. I always liked him.

Fix my doubt.

And my tendency to stress about the future.

And all the potholes in Tonga, they need to be fixed too.

Help Drew be motivated to finish his report on time.

And find enough scripture teachers for Bible in Schools in Tonga.

Give me motivation to finish my resource manual.

And my co-workers renewed commitment to turn up to training days. 

Help me to be better at forgiving people. 

And remind me on the terrible, no good, very bad days, that you have my back. 

We hosted another visitor over the last week and Piko has loved getting to know his “grandpa.”

My dad spent 7 days relaxing on the beach, meeting people from the FWC office, touring the island and catching up with us, after having not seen each other for nearly ten months.

Highlights included a spontaneous off road experience through plantations and getting a personal tour of a royal cemetery from the Royal Family’s talking chief. However, my favourite moment of the visit was when he remarked at how relaxed and less stressed I now am. This could be one of my greatest achievements in Tonga.

It’s sad that his short visit is now over. Happy sailing on your new ship Dad!

I don’t have Instagram.

I don’t actually know how it works… although I’ve worked out that it is some kind of photo application for a phone, and people seem to often snap random pictures of their feet and their meals with it. At least, that’s what appears in my Facebook feed.

I’m pretty sure Instagram hasn’t made it to Tonga yet. Just like “The Voice” and “One Direction” and McDonalds and other pop culture movements that Tonga is not bothered with.

But pretend it was. This is what I’d be Instagraming…

Large pumpkins good for soup. Working from home on community development training materials. Going for a run. My thank you present. New (to me) jackets from the flea market. My diary. 

We biked into the bakery and selected our treats, before finding a spot along the waterfront to have an afternoon tea picnic.

Featuring: meringues and cream puffs.

“
Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act.“ Psalm 37:7-9

Stillness. Patience.

Words I would not have used to describe my life pre – Tonga. Try crazy, hectic, jam-packed, stressful, on the go and most of all, busy.

Too busy to rest, too busy to catch up with friends properly, too busy to have enough date nights with my husband, too busy to exercise as much as I wanted, to busy to plan meals, to busy to return text messages or emails, too busy to stay and chat at church for longer than ten minutes, too busy for bible study and sadly, often too busy for God.

I used to pride myself on my multi tasking. Just how much I could cram into one day. How I couldn’t watch a movie without occupying my hands. How my mind would race at nighttime because it was filled with so many thoughts and reminders of things to get done. I was busy. Fulfilled. Accomplished. In control.

Probably the greatest idol in my life pre – Tonga?

My diary. Filled with endless to do lists. I was caught up in the sin of “being busy.”

This constant motion would not only take its toll on my physical health (frequent headaches) and emotional health (often too exhausted to spend quality time with love ones) but it was my spiritual life that suffered the most. Busyness and control go hand in hand. In my busyness I would forget that God has my back.

I needed to be busy to keep all the balls in the air. I needed to be busy because if I stopped – it would all come crashing down.

I’m not busy in Tonga.

And things didn’t come crashing down. Things are good, mostly. It was as simple as not cramming so many activities into my schedule. Not commuting for hours each day. Prioritising a smaller group of friends. Shopping less.

Downsizing life. Because with downsizing comes time.

I have time to stop on a dark road with my friend as we bike home, to just stare at the stars. I have time to sleep in. I have time to play with my dog. To email my friends. To exercise as much as I want. To make it to bible study each week. To listen to the singing outside my window, floating over the fence from the school next door.

I have time to wait and time to rest.

Isaiah 40:31: 
But those who wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.

Note: I may or may not be still working on the patience.

At most social events, Tongans will take a crazy amount of photos

of which there will be very silly shots

and a lot of self portraits. So, of course, being the good culturally relevant social worker that I am

I joined in too!

Although I’m still not sure if you are supposed to pose with one finger pointing or two? And what that even means?

At most social events, Tongans will also do a lot of singing. Usually, it’s together as a choir but at our training, it turned into Karaoke.

Even the catering team got in on the fun, because food and photos

are two things that Tongans are very passionate about!

However we did get a lot of work done, amongst all the silliness

Because everyone graduated! And we had a wonderful ceremony and much feastings!

I also had to give a speech and discovered that I don’t photograph well when I’m public speaking!

Keep reading if you want to read part of my speech (it was very long as in true Tongan form, I had much to say!) ….

“I believe that counselling has much to offer the community of Tonga. Counselling is one way to offer support, help and intervention to those within our community who may be struggling. It is one way to demonstrate our faith in action.

This training program hoped to provide a practical framework for effective basic counselling skills. We aimed to train a group of people within the community, from a diverse group of churches, not in how to be expert counsellors but in how to be accidental counsellors. People who within their church and their community, may be in positions of leadership and can be the first point of contact for people in crisis.

While we have wonderful NGOS within the community who are doing a fantastic job, there may be some people in Tonga who are not comfortable approaching in them for counselling services. Not yet. But these people may be comfortable in talking to their youth leader or their leader at church. And so, it makes sense to have a team of trained accidental counsellors in all church denominations.

This program aimed to develop a group of counsellors, equipping them with communication, questioning, assessment and referral skills so that they are trained to respond to people in crisis.

and we have been successful!

Each participant here tonight has demonstrated their passion and heart for their community. They have learnt to listen effectively and question wisely. They have learnt to ask what are often difficult and hard questions but to do this with confidence.

They have learnt to assess risk and assist people in clarifying their concerns. They have begun to understand that counselling is not just about problems but is about strengths and solutions. And each person here tonight was able to take these skills out into the community, at the beginning of this week, and to talk to the people they met about their lives, their concerns and their hopes.

This is a wonderful achievement and a great victory. I have been encouraged and inspired, not only by their hard work but by the compassion and empathy that has surrounded all their endeavors.

However, our program does not end here. In order to maintain relevancy, continual learning of skills and sustainable practice we hope to transform this program into a train the trainer model. To encourage our current group of accidental counsellors to put their skills into practice and when they feel confident in their ability, to pass on their newly acquired knowledge to another group. Learning must be shared. How wonderful it would be for these basic counselling practices to spread across Tonga, with local Tongan people taking the lead in this initative.

Counselling is a fairly new discipline in Tonga. Sitting amongst us tonight are the first group of community accidental counsellors trained in Tonga. They should be incredibly proud of all they have achieved, as I am proud of them.

They are ready for the challenge of using their new skills and knowledge to better support people within their church community, who may be in crisis.”

Hannah’s peanut butter and choc chip cupcakes (Makes approx 15)

• Several heaped tablespoons of peanut butter
• 80g unsalted butter, melted
• 1/2 cup brown sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1 2/3 cups SR flour
• A pinch each of baking powder and baking soda
•  Large pinch of salt
• 1 cup milk
• Dash of vanilla extract or essence
• 1 cup chocolate chips (or as much as you want)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line muffin pans with paper liners or grease with butter.

Beat butter and peanut butter together with electric beaters.

Add brown sugar and beat.

Add eggs and vanilla. Beat to combine.

In a separate bowl, combine flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt.

Alternate adding dry mixture and milk to the peanut butter mixture and mix well.

Add chocolate chips.

Drop batter into paper liners and fill each cup 2/3 full. Bake 12-15 minutes.

Or to sum up: I’ve been busy running an accidental counselling workshop for 38 wonderful participants, most of whom are youth leaders in their local churches.

Now usually 38 young people don’t give up their work, study and lives for two weeks to learn something that is still new in Tonga. This workshop was the first of its kind, which is why it generated a lot of public interest and I ended up on the news, three times in one week.

Yes that’s right, three times I appeared stuttering and slightly too anxious on the Tongan news.

But the training wasn’t about me. These 38 participants are the real rock stars of the show. Sometimes literally, as they liked to create original songs about counselling for their recap sessions. My favourite was:

“I love my job of counselling, reflecting people’s humanity, being responsive and acknowledging, being real and – genuine.“

I wonder where they got that from?

Lifeline Tonga, in partnership with Tonga Health, The National Forum of Church leaders and AYAD (being me) was aiming to “provide an introduction into counselling theory and skills for a group of accidental counsellors, being people in positions of leadership in their church or community. To also provide a comprehensive understanding of social justice and community support within a Christian context, to delegates from all church denominations in Tongatapu. 

This knowledge and skill will then be applied to work within each church denomination, in order to provide better psycho/social support to the community of Tonga.”

These students were amazing. Their capacity for empathic questioning and active listening was already so impressive but even more impressive, when you consider they had never engaged with these ideas before. And we had fun learning.

We played games to solidify our new knowledge and skills.

And I played too! Lucky I got the answer right….

I’m excited for her as she has been so looking forward to seeing her family and friends in the US but sad that I miss out on her company for the next three months. Bible study and church will not be the same without her contagious enthusiasm!